Amish Paradise

Hello Blighty

2009-06-02T17:31:00.005Z

And so it came to pass....after ten days, 8 countries and countless ales Jebediah Klunge and Associates have once again blessed this sceptered isle that is Britain, in no small part due to Gertrude the Moodeo. It has been a truly fantastic trip, and i'm sure that there will be many pictures been uploaded to Facebook as we speak.

Once again we would like to thank everyone who has sponsered and helped out. Thank you.

But what next? Stay tuned to find out what next year will bring.

Au revoir France

2009-06-02T17:27:00.001Z

Dijon - done

2009-05-31T13:29:00.003Z

(Old Halls of Justice)

Friday saw us leaving Avignon with Dijon our next target. After looking into the logistics of sweeping through Switzerland to claim another flag we decided to just pick up the motorway and get into Dijon early. Gertrude brought tghe usual levels of bewilderment and smiles to the locals faces and we found our hotel easily. (any reports of a cow like vehicle going through bus lanes and pedestrian zones are purely coincidental)

The hotel, The City Lofts, where fantastic. Located a short walk from the center of town, it had a fully fitted kitchen and bathroom and would be great if you where thinking of staying for a few days. We filled the fridge with drink and snacks and went for a scout around.

First "bar" we found was actually a coffee house and so we resigned ourselves to having a latte, next stop was a restaurant/bar in the Place de Duc, the center of town. 5.60 Euro for 50cl of beer was a bit hard to swallow. So we downed those and regrouped at the hotel for a quick bite to eat and a look at the good book, Rough Guide to Europe on a budget, and ploted our course to some local bars. The first of these was the Au Vieux Jean, a quirky little place with barrels for tables and bread tins for ashtrays, the French do smoke alot :) Good selection of drink and a few other bars/cafes nearby. The next bar took us right across the old town past all the Tudoresque timber framed buildings aswell as the dressed stone building with great archway gates and carvings leading into courtyards, you could just imagine the horses and carriage pulling out of them. Then we where at Le Cappucino which was near what looked like a council estate, Nice enough looking bar and good selection of beers but we where somewhat distracted by the youth using their feet to open a door, then the sirens of police and ambulances which stopped just up the street. Probably better a a quieter night. We beat a hastey retreat and crashed relatively early knowing we had the final leg to do on Saturday. Huzzah.

Ps. Funniest thing to happen to me, While walking back to the hotel and was nearly ridden down by a midget on a trike (No word of a lie) doing about 20mph. I couldn't stop laughing :)

Palais des Ducs, Dijon (3)

2009-05-29T21:26:00.002Z

Palais des Ducs, Dijon (2)

2009-05-29T21:25:00.001Z

Palais des Ducs, Dijon (1)

2009-05-29T21:23:00.001Z

Gertie at rest enroute to Dijon

2009-05-29T16:07:00.001Z

Gertie defends the walls at Avignon

2009-05-29T16:02:00.001Z

The coast road

2009-05-29T11:11:00.001Z

Thursday saw us awake later than normal and go for one last promenade before setting off along the coast road towards St. Tropez. It is a fantastic drive with great views. Lunch was had in Antimes and then a short hop along the coast to Cannes for one last swim and bask in the sun. Back on the road again and into St. Raphael, with St. Tropez visible across the bay but time was against us and we headed inland towards our destination, Avignon.
Avignon is a fantastic medieval city which was the home of the French Pope at one time. Unfortunatly we arrived abit late and so had a quick look around and then to a bar off the beaten track were we found a number of well oiled locals. Chatted with a few who had worked in London. Another goodnight. Huzzah.

PS. Saw a whore touting for business in Gertrudes car park. Gertie was not impressed.

Nice Nice

2009-05-29T08:16:00.002Z

After a hard days driving up through Italy from Ancona we arrived in Nice, via Monaco and Monti Carlo. Gertie loved been on the Grand Prix circuit. Quick check in and we were out on Le Promanade des Anglais and heading into Old town where we stumble on the bohemien bar, Distillieries Ideales, and settled down for a few pints of Kriek (cheery) beer. Then a stroll around the rest of the old town, we soon realised that every bar was showing the European Cup Final and so back to the DI for more Kriek :-). Huzzah.

Flirty Gertie

2009-05-27T07:01:00.001Z

Having disembarked in Ancona it was only right that we stop for a proper cappocino. meanwhile Gertrude batted her eyes at some Lambos.

We're on a boat

2009-05-26T18:32:00.002Z

(It's a long one) Well... where to begin. It's been two days since we arrived here in Split for the finish of the Sucata Split and we are just about to set sail on the over night ferry to Ancona. But lets not get ahead of ourselves, lets go back two days to Sunday.

(I may repeat myself here from previous blogs) We had a bit of a lie in in Ljubljana and made our way back to Gertie. Found that the square we had parked her up in for the night was holding a farmers market and tractor rally so we fitted in quiet nicely. Alas though that we also found that someone had ripped a few patches off Gertrudes left flank. Bastards. Much honking and heading turning once again ensued as we headed out of town with Dominic at the wheel and Matt co-piloting as we headed up into the Slovinian mountains once again to test Doms skills. The journey down through the mountains was very twisty and roadwork free this day and we were soon down in the lowlands were we where able to finally stop along side some real cows (Krava) and see them grazing together, it was a beautiful moment. One odd moment was seeing some locals honking at a police car which was driving under the speed limit, they then over took him. We where not so brave and waited for them to pull in. Onwards we went towards the border and we found ourselves behind the Pale Riders car. Border crossing was uneventful and we got our passports stamped. We drove over the river to find the Riders had pulled up for a photo op. This seemed to displease the Croatian guards who went to have a word. We pulled up and where approached by a very deadpan faced lady armed with a 9mm pistol came to check our passports. She didn't seem that impressed by Gertie, and said she was a bad investment, though we could tell that she was in fact cracking a little humour. After a few minutes of her just holding our passports she gave them back and even honked out roof mount horn. Great Success. (also she told the Pale Riders that our car was better :) )

Once into Croatia we headed back onto the motorways and hoped to make good time down to the finish line. A quick water/toilet break turned into a slightly longer coffee break, and as we sat there we heard before we saw the Team Rambo boys who flew past the services, not sounding good. We got back on the road again and were slowed some what by a roadworks but once these had cleared my foot became somewhat leadened and I whipped Gertie into a fast trot. Out in the distance we spied the unmissable yellow of Team General Ignorance's "LeCitroen" and a plan was hatched, Dom armed the bowser as I used a passing BMW as cover and we flew past giving a broadside as we passed. Much whooping and celebration ensued. It seemed like only moments later that we where in Split and pulling into the car park of Hadjuk Splits Stadium to make the finally preparations to Gertie, bowser primed, Bob gaffa taped to the roof and straw hats firmly on head, the final few 100 yards was upon us and we headed for the finish. Kate (Keith, Karen, Kit-Kat) from the Sucata team was there to guide us in and we finally came to rest alongside the Mad Hatters, Team Rambo, Team Chaos, Chilli and Chocolate, Phat & Phin, Green Jackets and the Ay Team, oh, and Dominic, the last remaining member of Before I Fall to Pieces, Who's car never even made it out of Brugge. Huzzah. England prevails.

All that was left to do was sit and await the arrival of the other teams, while having a few celebratory beers and some cracking local food. In dribs and drabs the other teams arrived, Team G.I., Cool Runnings, Pale Riders, Banana Splits and the Morris Men. All that was left of to do now was get in the Adriatic and wash away the weariness of the day, or in my case the shirt i'd been wearing for four days :) Hour or so down at the beach chilling and we slowly filtered away to our respective hotels/hostels. Ours was Als place which we where sharing with the Madhatters and Team Chaos. We settled in and headed to the bar for the awards ceremony. More beer was drunk and Chris came to announce the total (to date) raised and awards. All told we'd achieved the target of £25K, which will be go up once some firms match the donations of their employees. huzzah. Then the awards, Most money raised went to Before I Fall to Pieces (Now known as Team Dom), Best Fancy dress went to The Morris Men, Worst Mishap went to Team Dom and the most coveted prize of all, Best car in show went to Jebediah Klunge & Associates. Great Success. Gertrude had truly done us proud. More drinking ensued until the Police arrived to close the bar, panic buying saw Dom bring into play a set of skills acquired over many years, which makes him a nightmare for people like the barmaid. She was broken down easily and bottles of Tequila, Vodka and Rum ( with mixers) left with us and down to the Marina. Here we stayed, chatting, drinking, accapella singing, trying out Sumo suits and other camaraderie until the sunrose...not became light but actually visible above the building. Great night ended with climbing into bed in a nice air conditioned room. Sucata Split 2009, finally finished. More to follow.

Resting

2009-05-25T14:22:00.001Z

Chilling by the beach in Split with the Mad Hatter girls. Saw several teams scrap their cars today which was the end of the Tour but the start of our trip back to Blighty. Huzzah

Sucata Split - done

2009-05-24T15:39:00.001Z

Great success. Much celebrating now. Proper blog later

2009-05-24T12:03:00.001Z

Cracking evening along the main drag of Ljubljana. There was a fashion show on the opposite bank which may account for the high percentage of fit girls promenadeing up and down the street.
Our roomies, Ruth, Jesse and Lauren had some difficulty explaining to Micha, a Spanish girl, what Morris men are. In french :-)
Found there was a farmers market in the morning so Gertrude was in her element. Only low point was that someone has skinned part of her.
Had another morning of Dominics mountain skills to avoid the Slovenian motorways.
Border crossing went smoothly with a very deadpan gun toteing lady seeing us through. So here we are in Croatia with Split in our sights. Huzzah.

Ljubljana is ours

2009-05-23T17:55:00.002Z

So, here we are in the lovely Slovinian capital. Currently sat by the river enjoying a "not" pint of local ale after a different day of driving. As the cost of using the motorways here is stupidly expensive we chose to go on the A roads (or as I like to call them, dirt tracks) which took us up into the mountains. Dominic was in control for Gertrude and yet remarkably, with the hair-pins, roadworks, and handbrake turns we made it here.

We unfortunately missed out on seeing Lake Bled due to a break down in communication but on the plus side we have got to know the girls in our hostel room. So good relations have been established prior to Dom ruining them later with his farting and snoring.

Tonight will see more drinking and team building, networking. Huzzah.

Ps. The ladies here are absolutely beautiful :)

Austria - Done

2009-05-23T14:25:00.001Z

After a slightly lazy start to the day, we are making good time to Ljubljana

2009-05-23T00:25:00.002Z

A very good evening has been had in Munich. Nearly started with an international incident when some twat tried to steal my hat, he soon saw the error of his ways and fled into the night. We joined our fellow Sucacteers in the Hofbrauhaus. many large ales and jaegermeister where sunk and dispite our best efforts to get some Weisswurst senf we had to settle for a brockwurst. Still very nice. Much team networking was done and I personally had a chance to chat with Chilli & Chocolate and The ladies of The Mad Hatters.

The Morris men where on top form yet again and remain our only rivals in the "Staying in custom" award. It appears that all the teams are doing well with getting from A to B (except Fall to Pieces, still no key for their car and therefore stuck in Brugge)

Tomorrow promises to be a good day, Team Cool Runnings has organised a five aside footy match on the shores of Lake Bled in Slovinia. We've coupled up with Chilli and Chocolate (two cracking Leicestershire lasses) to form Team " God Wills It". Team Rambo are apparently providing the BBQ. Touch Me.

TTFN

PS. Dom is desperate to top todays 197Kph after finding out General Ignorance did 203Kph. God Wills It. Huzzah.

Munich - Done

2009-05-22T18:39:00.002Z

Awaken at 7am by the lovely sounds of the Cathedrale de Notre Dame (and my phone alarm playing Pendulam) decided to snooze some more. Eventually got up and had a very nice continental breakfast in a square just around the corner from the Cathedrale.

I had the responsibility of doing the first stint of the day and with much excitement we headed for Germany and it fantastic auto-bahns. Gertrude performed with flying colours and I managed to tease 113mph out of her. A quick pit stop and Dom took over, Gertie must of enjoyed the rest as he top her at 123mph :) great success.

Then on to serious stuff, looking for something to do/see along the route we decided to make a slight detour to the town of Dachau and it's memorial and museum to the contentration camp that was there during WW2. For me it was a very sobering time, walking around the old work house and one of the rebuilt barracks. Just the sheer size of the place was shocking and this was just one of countless camps.

Back onto more fun time, Bobs constant deflating brought us to get some expanding foam from a building merchants and much mess ensured as Matt and Dom wrestled to get the stuff inside him. We'll see how he reacts to it in the morning.

As we aren't allowed into Munich proper with Gertie (due to her emissions being filthy) we had to park up at Pasing and get the train in. Easy once we found the right platform, short walk from the station found us at the Wombat hostel and a very nice receptions sorted us out and was very pleased with the cowpat we donated.

Now into Munich for a few steins of fine white beers.

PS. we will either have victory or hatred from the organisers as we are sharing a room with them. Huzzah.

Return

2009-05-21T23:11:00.002Z

We return to the Michelet hotel, all the worst for beer, ricard and a crafty kebab next stop Munchen ! Huzzah.

2009-05-21T16:47:00.001Z

PS. Jeb has lost a bag !!

2009-05-21T16:30:00.002Z

Arrival in Strasbourg complete, gertie is safely stowed in a french cow cave, incident free journey accompanied by classical war themes !!

Another pat presentation ceremony was successfully discharged !!

Slightly rainy but still fine for cow movements, now we shall imbibe !

The Pale Riders

2009-05-21T11:24:00.001Z

Team Rambo

2009-05-21T11:22:00.001Z

The Mad Hatters

2009-05-21T11:18:00.001Z

The Banana Splits

2009-05-21T11:16:00.001Z

The start line

2009-05-21T11:11:00.002Z

9:30 A carpark on the outskirts of Brugge (It's in Belgium) and we are ready to go. Gertrude has grazed well and her inards are producing a noxious cloud of gas. Next destination Strasbourg via a lunch break somewhere in Luxembourg. Huzzah.

BRUGGE - Done

2009-05-20T17:04:00.001Z

We have made it to the start point. We shall now go and celebrate with some local beers. Huzzah

The white cliffs

2009-05-20T12:31:00.001Z

We have made it to Dover. Now enjoying a pint on the ferry as my stint as driver is over for the day. Matt takes over the reins once we hit Calais.

Farewell Blighty

2009-05-20T08:48:00.001Z

And so it begins. Next stop Dover, via the Wonder Cafe for one last English meal.

2009-05-20T01:13:00.001Z

And so we set off, Jeb and Dom working hard the night before to bring you the most hi tech coverage of the epic journey !!

Gets even hornier

2009-05-17T15:43:00.001Z

Gertie gets horny

2009-05-17T15:36:00.001Z

2009-04-26T21:08:00.001Z

The hi-tech gps

2009-04-26T16:34:00.001Z

Klunge farm takes shape

2009-04-26T16:32:00.001Z

Bob at the wheel

2009-04-25T23:28:00.001Z

Flirty Gertie

2009-04-25T23:25:00.001Z

I can see Gertrudes whispering eye

2009-04-25T23:23:00.001Z

Places to visit 2

2009-04-25T23:20:00.001Z

Gerties bum

2009-04-25T23:18:00.001Z

Places to visit

2009-04-25T23:16:00.001Z

Gertrudes strange birth mark

Make over

2009-04-25T23:14:00.001Z

And so it begins

Gertrude

2009-04-25T15:49:00.001Z

The naked Gertrude awaits her make over.

Birth of horns 4

2009-04-14T09:53:00.001Z

Birth of horns 3

2009-04-14T09:52:00.001Z

Birth of horns 2

2009-04-14T09:50:00.001Z

The birth of horns

2009-04-14T09:48:00.002Z

Work begins on forming the horns for Gertrude the cow-car. The Ford Mondeo that we shall be driving across Europe in (and hopefully back again)

Me Southbound

2009-03-30T11:05:00.002Z

I look like a terrorist :/